i actually get decent grades on the papers i write at 1am so don’t you dare tell me i need to change my ways
my god my friends are attractive
so i was in class looking at my nails and i see that my nail polish chipped off in the shape of a head
but then i looked some more and thats not just any head, thATS BRUNO MARS
the ceo of abercrombie and fitch has a lot of nerve saying that ugly people shouldn’t wear his clothes when he looks like a caucasian orc from the lord of the rings
why do we call them “college aus” when we could be calling them “alternate universities”
Someone’s probably in love with you right now, even though you think you’re boring and stupid and smell bad most of the time, someone probably saw you last week and wiped their sweaty hands on the insides of their pockets and thought about your body under your clothing and about how you would look asleep in their bed
how do you even pronounce whouffle? who-flay? who-full?
so I was at relay for life and guess what was just meandering around the track
it just kept going around the track yelling exterminate
I literally cannot think of anything more ironic than a Dalek participating in Relay for Life.
His doctor recommended it